SAILING TOGETHER

Written by Royal David

Wedding planning and preparation has often time been known as women’s affair, left to be handled by the bride, her mum and friends. Gone are those days where the groom is happily going about his daily routine while the bride talks and visit the vendors all by herself. Ladies! You see, some guys are very homely and are good with domestics and organizing but really don’t know how to come in or get involved. And hey! Guys your ladies needs you to be involved, they want  you to give an opinion about the colours, they need your negotiating skills, and they want you to be by them every step of the planning stage at least to give some compliment, like “wow! Babes I didn’t know you can negotiate this much, or dear, that was a good choice with the florist” Actually many couples don’t realize this but this will probably be the fist major project of your lives together as a couple, and working together goes a long way to binding you two, thereby improving your relationship.

Now ladies, since I know how much you would love to have him involved, here are some steps to help you get your man involved in the planning stage.

• Make room for him

As women we unconsciously have the tendency of trying to do it all by ourselves, sometimes we try to do the work of the wedding planner in the bid to have everything come out as expected. It’s a natural nature of most hard working, detailed and excellent conscious women. Since you are aware of this you have to make a conscious effort to create room for him to come in, carry him along, especially when it comes to suggestions and decisions making. Give him the impression that you need his opinion to be able to make a quick decision in his absence (e.g sending photos to his mobile device for quick response). Share the task and give him some responsibility. You must also understand that he may never have been reading wedding magazines or blogs like mine, so you may have to give him details, checklist and also create room for some lapses as he may never do the job like you will, but what is important is that the job is done.

Key points: Suggestions/opinions

                    Task sharing/ division of labour

• Make use of his Interest

 Am sure there is something your guy likes doing or does base on his profession. If he is an author or likes writing or reading, let him be in charge of the writings for the programs, invitations, vows as the case maybe. If he has interest in motion pictures editing or you’ve heard him talked about the graphics and cameras used in some movies, he should be in charge of sorting for the best photographers and video camera crew. If he is an accountant, let him prepare the wedding budget. If he is someone that can cook well, then he must join you in the food and pastries menu listing, as well as the trial and test with the caterers. If he is into fashion, then you can work together as regards choosing colours and getting some of the accessories.

Key point: Interest/Profession

 

• Flash back

 Task his brain by taking him down memory lane. Ask him of the times he had been a best man at other weddings, all the things the groom complained about during the occasion and probably sent him here and there to fix, while the event was still on. Or ask him of some other things he didn’t like or liked at other weddings he attended. What he loved the most, which one had more fun and why etc? This will give you an idea  his preferences and you too should do the same to give you both a better understanding, so that your choices can sync.

Key point: Memory

Now to you bro, in order to know where you can be involved, so you can simply help out without her asking, here are some wedding manly duties (as well as interest) I have prepared here.

• Budget: You and I know you really want to know how much this whole thing will cost, so your guess is as good as mine, be in charge of the budget.
• Compare/Mc (Master of ceremony): Most compare are usually men, so do a man to man talk with the compare, to have you checkmate movements of people, Dj, photo order and the toast section etc. to have things play in your tune as you may not be able to move or say anything before your vote of thanks on that day.
• Sound/Music: Since most guys know more about good sound quality, be in charge of contracting the sound managers, musical band and DJs. You can work with your fiancée in the music aspect, so you both can make a list of your favourite songs that you want to hear and have the Dj arrange them in that order.
• Bar Menu: Ah! We both know this is your cue, as your friends too are interested in this area. Most guys are more familiar with the different kind of exotic drinks, wine, champagne, liquor, juice, cocktail etc. Take the responsibility of tasting and purchasing drinks for your wedding reception.
• Mobility: Most men are car freaks and if you are one of them, you should be in charge of renting or picking those exotic cars needed for the wedding, as you’ll have more idea of the ones in vogue, their cost price as well as the opportunity to test run (cool right?)
• Honeymoon: You should take up the responsibility to plan for the honeymoon, find out about the places your bride will like to visit, give your spouse a surprise, be involved in the airport runs with travel agents if your trip involves traveling outside the country.
• Appreciation: As traditional demands, it is the man’s responsibility to prepare a speech for vote of thanks, it is also his duty to send out thank-you cards or sms as the case may be after the wedding, to parents, wedding vendors and invitees from him and his wife.

 Grooms try and get involved; you’ll love the whole process and brides you know what to do now, because two good heads is better than one. It’s all going to help build your wedding experience and history.

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(For inquiries on wedding tips, good wedding vendors in Nigeria or you need an excellent wedding planner that can give you the best with your budget, contact us on royaltyokasions@gmail.com